Say What?!

Being an over-analyser and someone who loves words can be a deadly combination, particularly when it comes to breaking down the things that people say to me. Because of this, sayings that are quite common to others are often a source of amusement to me, so I thought I'd share just a couple of things I hear that make me laugh a little on the inside every time.

1. Have a safe flight! I enjoy this because it seems to suggest that I have some sort of control over the situation. I can almost understand "have a safe drive" or "have a safe holiday", because you have at least a partial bit of responsibility, but a flight? I can think of some pretty obvious ways to make the flight unsafe, ways I won't write here in case it gets this blog flagged for the wrong reasons, so I can only really assume people are warning me against doing those things.
2. That's funny. Hmmm, is it though? Now I get why people say this. Sometimes things are humorous, enough so to deserve recognition, but not enough to draw out a laugh. It just seems like such an odd statement, like commenting on a Facebook photo and saying "I like this" rather than just hitting the like button.
3. Forget I said that. Most people would understand that just because you tell someone to forget something, doesn't mean it's necessarily going to happen. In fact, it most likely won't. But I'm working on a theory that this isn't the reason why people say it. In fact, I think most people use it as a way to passive aggressively reflect their anger at a situation. You say "forget I said that" not in a literal way, but in a way to say "I didn't get the response that I was hoping for, and maybe if I tell you to forget about it you'll realise that". And yes, I do find that humorous.
4. I paid good money for that! Oh did you? I usually only try to spend my bad money... Seriously, what is good money and what makes it more morally just then all the rest of the dough in the world?
5. I'll be honest with you... Whenever someone leads with this, I immediately think, what are you the rest of the time? Has our whole relationship been a lie up until this point?! Should I only believe everything you preface with this sentence?!? OK, so it's not that dire and I know people use this phrase to highlight how honest they are being in that moment, but it still makes me laugh.

Before anyone starts an uproar, I will admit that I say all of these sayings. Every single one of them (from the extensive list of 5 that I wrote). And even when these phrases come from my own lips, I still find them amusing.